#something about wanting more girl faves in bsd and her showing up like with her fucked up morals... being perfectly my taste in character..

[strayslost]

gonna work on starters tomorrow (about to head to bed now) but god i wish we knew more about agatha so bad. i wish i could somehow write her. idek why i'm attached considering she's had all of two lines of dialogue but i can tell i'm gonna love her a lot...

[disaster-bay-leaf]

Ok so these were the cutest~ (ㆁωㆁ)

4, 6, 7, 9, 12, 19, 22, 23, 28, 33, 34, 46, 47, 52, 59, 60, 63, 66, 83, 87, 88, 93, 99

I kno I listed like....all of them lmao but feel free to answer whichever you want and ofc you can ask me in return Baybe ( ◜‿◝ )♡

uHUHUHUHU much content for me to answer, im happy bebe 💜💜💜✨

4 - how do you take your coffee/tea?

hm coffee either Very Black No Sugar (for the sleep deprived me) or iced latte three sugars and theres no in between

and as for tea its All Black Teas That Exist, cinnamon-flavoured especially (but basically all teas that come to mind when u think “autumn”), and rooibos!!! okay basically the only oke i dont like is any type of green tea (which is sad because they look cool but my tastebuds said ✨no✨)

6 - do you keep plants?

honestly id l o v e too because i love plants but,,, im kinda horrible at taking care of them though still way better than the majority of my family (research helps) so the only plant i own is kinda a small-palm-tree-looking thing in a bigass glass jar that i saved from my mother’s plant-destructing hands and its mostly doing well (the ends of its leaves are starting to be yellow tho and im worried:((( )

7 - do you name your plants?

yes!!! though the current one was named by my sister and its called “pickett” after fantastic beasts shsjjsj

9 - do you like singing/humming to yourself?

oh god oh dude you have n o idea

i have absolutely n o singing voice but its something i do constantly to give my brain the right amount of stimuli so basically i listen to music 24/7 and hum to myself 99% of that time

12 - whats your favourite planet?

oh i actually didnt think about this for so long but either pluto (hes a planet screw nasa) or saturn (RINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) or venus (girls,,,and libra,,,)

19 - do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw in it?

okay im gonna be completely honest with yall and say that my every single try at keeping a journal failed spectacularly and i lost motivation after like a few months so my only journals rn are my fancy fake-leather-bound calendar to note tests and assessments into, a kinda roughed up notebook that i uses for noting down poems or scribbling or passing notes in class, and a kinda fancy bullet journal notebook that i used as a book of shadows for a while but since my fountain pen died i didnt touch it

22 - are you a morning person?

n o

i am so not a morning person but i wish i could be because honestly dawns are beautiful

but as it is rn im either sleep deprived all the time and loathe every second of being in an awake state or (if i have a few days of schoolbreak) my biological clock moves forward a few hours and i sleep 2am-10am

23 - whats your favourite thing to do on lazy days with zero obligations?

except for the fact that i dont remember the last time it happened, i would probably spend it drawing outside, watching anime with my sister and riding a bike around the forest

28 - sunrise or sunset?

i love sunrises because its so peaceful and everyone is asleep but also i subconsciously immediately correlate them with waiting for a train to take me to school (because thats basically the only time i see them) so its a bittersweet love especially with my fucked up biological clock

but sunsets are really really pretty too and i see them more often so i cant choose

33 - whats your fave pastry?

and isnt that a millior-dollar question dhsjjsjsj

either cinnamon rolls (i absolutely adore them) or that one specific type of cupcake-shaped-thing made out of shortcrust/bread/whatever its called and filled with vanilla pudding

34 - tell us about a stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

awwww this is cute

okay so basically my two favourite stuffed animals (i still have them, they sit in my wardrobe) were two teddy bears (like maybe 20cm high each of them) and one was pure brown and the other was silver-brown and they had stereotypical polish male names “Waldek” (read. Valdek) and Stefan (i think tho im not sure if i remember correctly, my memory is a feeble thing sometimes

46 - tell us the worst pun you can think of

what dog would never bite you? a hot dog *badumtss*

47 - what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

huh a year ago id say pineapple pizza but i guess i dont hate pineapples that much anymore (tho putting them on pizza is still an abomination) but i think that if id ever want to get rid of anything it would be parsley, i hate that freakin herb (does it count as food tho)

52 - what are your favourite memes of the year so far?

the ever given for sure shsjshjsjsjsjjsj

but bullying tramp stamps is gold and pure tumblr energy too

as for fandom memes: im in love with all keeping-up-with-the-todorokis variations and the fact that the entire bsd fandom looked at fukuchi and said “biTCH” and thats one of the only things we’re unanimous about

59 - whats your favourite myth?

i always liked the kora/persephone myth (though demeter is an overbearing parent to the nth power), loki and thor crossdressing at a party to get mjolnir back, atalanta because shes a queen and id politely ask her to kick my ass, and cassandra because she deserved better, and theres a l o t more because alas i was a mythology nerd but this post is long enough for me not to make this section 20 times longer sjjsjsjsjsjks

but there are a lot of slavic myths that are very cool too, though we dont know that much about them as about the greeks for example

60 - do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

o o o o h yeah i do like poetry because to create such a beautifully sounding thing with only words someone has to be a genius

some of my favs are: some works of nakahara chuuya (thank u bsd for introducing me to this man’s beautiful imagery in his works i swear to god the descriptions do it for me) (also his poem about having hangovers is a mood like i feel you buddy), the raven by ea poe (i know everyone likes it but hOLY DAMN THE INTER/INTRAVERSE RHYMES ARE LIKE,,, BREATHTAKING) (and aso im a slut for gothic horror), and many more but also That One Poem From Welcome To Nightvale about reaching the island in the west,,, only perfect vibes from it

63 - are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organised or kinda leave them be?

okay heres the thing. for anyone else both my playlist library and my bookshelf would be considered pure chaos of a mad man b u t they actually have a highly focused system which means that i sort them based on their vibes, lovability and (in case of books) their age and whether or not theyre a part of a series so i would say my bookshelf is rather organised (when a quarter of it isnt occupying my desk that is) and my music is more organised than not but sometimes it gets out of control and i have to sort it entirely again

66 - what would your ideal flower crown look like?

either entirely constructed of simple white daisies, entirely constructed of only white roses, or something that probably would win a “how many different coloured flowers can one fit in a flower crown” competition

or something purple (maybe not belladonna)

83 - whats some of your favourite album art?

god i dont know if it counts but hozier’s wasteland baby is probably one of my absolute favourites and no one shall beat that

“thrifted youth” (dalynn) and “standard deviation” (danny schmidt) have very aesthetic covers too

also the iconic p!atd too weird to live, too rare to die! album cover,,, its just iconic what can i say

and last but not least matt meason’s pink-and-black album covers (though bank on the funeral is really pretty too but like,,, “who killed matt meason” d o e s it for me and so does the 2017 tribulation single)

87 - what are some movies that you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

this is such a hard question because im not a really cinematography-oriented gal but i suppose that (at the risk of not going deep enough into the cinema world):

- the princess bride

- inception

- night at the museum

- SPIRITED AWAY

- forrest gump

- truman show

- E.T. (i cried okay)

- the lord of the rings (because damn me if this isnt one impressive adaptation)

- parasite

and one more personal recommendation: “ready or not” with samara weaving because goddamn i dont usually watch this genre but holy s h i t is it good

93 - whats the hairstyle you wear the most?

honestly just plain hair down (because having curly hair is a menace), split in the middle when i have longer hair and split on one side when its short

also low ponytails or half-up-half-down when im exercising, or double french braids when my hair doesnt cooperate enough to look presentable in any other form

99 - list some songs that resonate with your soul whenever you hear them

this is difficult because my music taste is a goddamn rollercoaster on a good day, but heres some:

- me and the sky from “come from away” musical (this is sort of a test song for my mental stability, if i cry i aint stable)

- dancing after death by matt meason (okay most songs by matt meason except for like,,, hallucinogenics maybe)

- tears and rain by james blunt

- i will follow you into the dark by death cab for cutie

- almost home by mxmtoon

- anything by hozier really but shrike especially

- payphone, the cover by alex g (i cried to this song so many times)

- burning pile by mother mother (can i roast all my problems please)

- long way from home and cleopatra by the lumineers

- autoclave by the mountain goats

oooh that was c o o o o o o o l as fuck thank you sm so much bebe (and sorry for the long post @everyone else)

[ranposlittle]

Hi! I don't know if you've ever answered this but I'm really curious to know as to why you've chosen Ranpo? I mean why do you like him in particular? Oh and what do you think about Mori? And who are your top 3 characters from BSD (like Dada material characters)? I've got so many questions🖤🖤🖤

Haha it's absolutely fine, anon~ I would love to answer all the questions that you have for me (●ˊᵕˋ●)

Warning: I'll be taking about some sensitive or possibly triggering topics on my answer about Mori (on item number 2). Please skip it and prioritize your mental health first 🤗

I've actually talked more in depth about this in the Q & A, but what I like about dada in particular is that he's not an ability user. I find it extremely attractive (and super hot) to see a "normal" man keeping up with the finest ability users out there. I also like the complexity of his character. I'd love to expound on this so if you'd like, I can make a whole post for it haha bcos really I have so much to say. As to why he's my "dada", basically, I just can see him as a dom haha in my own opinion of him, I think he likes to be the one who have the say on things. Of course, not to the point of being overly controlling, but more of liking the feeling of being "the man" haha. I mean, even Fukuzawa- the only person he have so much respect for- can't even order him around sometimes. He doesn't like to be looked down upon on or to be treated like he's an ignorant child, he's just lazy about the things he deemed unimportant. He likes to be praised and be viewed in high regards, so I think he'll appreciate someone who is a sub bcos subs do just that with their doms. I also think that he acts all childish but when with someone who is a bit more childish or innocent than him (for example, Kenji and Kyoka), he is very willing to act more responsibly. He doesn't mind explaining to Kenji the details of something he doesn't understand, or to instruct Kyoka how you eat a certain candy– even if he ended up eating it himself haha like, imagine this. Me, a sub, telling him: "Can you pls teach me how to open a ramune?" He will smile proudly and reply, "Of course, I can! I'm the best there is. You can't do anything without my help, don't you? Come here, I'll show you." — that'll be very dom of him haha he's very capable of being in charge if he wants to and idk I just don't think he's more into submitting. I think maybe bcos of his underlying insecurity, he would like to have that constant affirmation that he's the best and he's at the top of everything. Combine that with his playfulness, you get the best kind of a daddy– dominating but still fun. So yeah hehe I hope I made any sense 😅

Ooh, Mori. I have a lot of thoughts about Mori haha but to put it simply, I feel nothing towards him. I don't like him nor do I hate him. I'm truly indifferent towards him. The only time that I thought about Mori for a long time was when one night, I sat up on my bed thinking if Mori touches Elise (in a you-know-what way) or if he can even touch her at all. I looked it up and found a post explaining that the protagonist in Vita Sexualis expressed how he think he's asexual. This is the post and they also made some good points about Mori so pls check it out. So it made me wonder, if this is where Mori's ability is derived from, does he feels sexual attraction to Elise or just plain attraction? Because if we are going to go with the notion that he feels no need for sexual gratification, then we can say that he's only attracted to Elise. But why? The thought I came up with is maybe his attraction isn't really about age– bcos his attraction is towards Yosano. Well, Yosano's child self at that. It's possible that the first time he felt anything remotely close to admiring or being attracted to someone is when he met Yosano. Perhaps it's because of the beauty he found on her ability, or maybe her strong personality, but the bottom line is: Yosano became the image of his idea of what love or attraction is. This is what I came up with bcos I parallel Mori to the character of Humbert Humbert in the book "Lolita" where he became attracted to minors bcos of his first love when he was 14. Maybe Mori never got out of that moment bcos he might've felt like his "love" for Yosano was cut short or that she was taken away from him, and that's why he kept Elise in that age, bcos that's how old Yosano was when she was "his". At least that's is how I see it. Don't get me wrong, I'm not justifying or moralizing his actions. I just think that maybe Mori isn't gonna be attracted to just any child, I think he will be if they possess certain characteristics, like how H.H. likes "nymphets". I haven't read the manga though and I don't know when Mori manifested Elise, if it's before or after he met Yosano. Or if Elise's appearance has always been of a little girl. So I could be totally wrong with this and if that's the case then, never mind everything I said haha

I got asked a similar question before but it's just my fave characters and not the ones who I think is "dada-material" haha so just to be clear, aside from dada, my top 3 faves would be: Tachihara Michizou, Kenji Miyazawa and Q. So, for the top 3 characters that for me are "dada-material", it would be: Junichiro Tanizaki, Chuuya Nakahara and Oda Sakunosuke~ Bonus: Yukichi Fukuzawa. But only if you're into older men of course hehe

Thank you for your ask, anon! I had fun and I really love answering all of them~ don't be shy to ask more when you get the chance, ok? Bye bye~ ₍ᐢ. ̫.ᐢ₎

[linkspooky]

Who are your top five BSD characters?

I love to talk about  how much I love my faves. If you ever ask want to ask me who my faves are for a series feel free to send me an ask.

1. Human Failure - Dazai Osamu

I like that he’s a bad person. I know I say this a lot, but I really do think stories are at their best when they allow characters to be bad people.. The narration itself never tries to make excuses for who Dazai is, or gloss over what he’s done in the name of making him look good. It just allows him to exist as is. Dazai is a total failure of a human being, but at the same time he’s more human than any of us. 

You get the sense that Dazai is an overgrown kid who just, never learned to deal with any of the things that adults learn to deal with as a result of growing up as a person. He views himself as this non-human thing and at first when he’s much younger means he thinks he can do whatever he want. 

There’s a lot of works in ficiton that attempt to correct the misery in “No Longer Human” Osamu Dazai’s final work, which to me is really a disrespectful response to the work itself. Like, Dazai wasn’t trying to comment on society, and he didn’t think he was more right than anybody else or saw through the lies of society. Dazai wasn’t trying to be miserable on purpose or like, meditate on human nature. 

I am writing a tired story for young readers,

not because I want to be different,

or because I am unconcerned with young readers’ tastes.

I write it rather because I know it will please them.

Young readers are tired and old themselves these days,

and my story can bring them no discomfort and no surprises.

It is a story for those who have lost hope.

No Longer Human is just this deeply honest and brutal work of his that stands on his own. People feel the need to make miserable things happy and correct them, but sometimes things are beautiful because they are miserable. Dazai himself as a character is like one of the only responses to No Longer Human that I’ve ever been able to digest, because it’s not trying to correct anything. 

Dazai is a bad person, but he’s still undeniably human he’s not something lesser or greater than human, and in his own way he is trying to live too. A lot of people forget the humanity of the work. 

2. Old Sport - F Scott Fitzgerald

He shares the name with the author, but Fitzgerald is so obivously based off the main character of the author’s most famous work, the Great Gatsby. Gatsby is at the same time, a scathing critique of the false dreams we spend our entire lives working towards, but at the same time instead of condemning us for dreaming in the first place like a lot of critiques do, it instead reaffirms that humans wants to dream, that they live because they want to strive for something and that there’s still worth in that even if it ends up entirely in failure. 

Gatsby believed in the green light, the orgastic future that year by year recedes before us. It eluded us then, but that’s no matter—tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther… . And then one fine morning—So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.

Gatsby sailed against the current, and it ended with him drowning and yet his efforts in life were not worthless. The book portrays that kind of complexity, that there are two sides to everything. 

“You can’t repeat the past.”“Why of course you can!”

And as a character Fitz embodies that complexity just as well. His goals are good, what else but family can you burn everything for? Yet at the same time, you see he goes the extra mile in trying to destroy everything around him for the sake of his goals. Just like Gatsby, his goals are inherently one impossible to achieve and two, self destructive. Yet, there’s something brilliant in watching how this man will not give up and will continually break himself against the currents trying to reach just a little bit farther.

3. Ugly Girl - Lucy Maud Montgomery

Lucy is a character I like because she’s the introduction of how victims can be more grotesque and violent. They are not always people who beg to be saved the way Atsushi and Kyouka do. As the story advances, it becomes deeper and deeper in complexity especially when it comes to the issue of saving the orphans, and being on the side of helping people. It’s not always so noble a thing as Atsushi makes it seem to be, it is sometimes messy and even harmful.

What I likea bout Lucy is that nothing about her is straightforward. Trauma has made it possible that she cannot be straightforward or forthcoming with her own emotions in any way. Not only that but you can still see just like Atsushi the effects of being raised as an unwanted child in an orphanage have not worn off. She gets mad when Atsushi ignores her, because she feels at any moment he might abandon her. Her assumption is that people will not care, that they will fail her and Atsushi has to work against these assumptions. 

Ultimately what I like is that Lucy does not get saved, but rather starts to save herself. The reason that she’s on this list instead of characters I like for the same reasons is that she’s started to show the growth that Akutagawa really has the potential to show and I myself cannot wait until he hits. She’s started to grow for the sake of one boy who inspired her and related to her, and in the end it’s more like she was the one who saved Atsushi which led to one of the most beautiful moments in the second arc of the manga. 

4. A Monster Without a Heart - Nikolai Goggol

Goggol is one of my favorite characters despite being only around for a few chapters at most. The ideas behind his character are so interesting and thematically rich. He’s a character who decides to live and die entirely based around the concept of freedom.

Due to that fact he’s far more insightful and clever than most of the characters in the manga. He’s the only person who can be on equal terms with Dostoevsky, rather than just being either a total sycophant, or someone mind controlled like the rest of his compatriots. That’s because Goggol as terrible as he is completely owns who he is as a person. 

His lines are some of the best in the series. The moment where he takes off his mask and reveals to Atsushi he’s not the villain of the story, but a human being completely aware of the harm he’s causing others just completely smashes Atsushi’s simple black and white values of good and evil he has been fighting with so far. It reminds the audience once more that this is a story about human beings. 

5. Just a Normal Person- Edogawa Ranpo

Ranpo is here for two reasons. One my love of detective novels, and Ranpo exists as a tribute to those same novels so every plot he is involved in reads as a love letter to my favorite genre. The second is that Ranpo himself is so interesting a person, because he’s so clearly coded as someone neurodivergent and not able to fit in with a lot of society.

Yet, he’s the only case of such a character where I’ve seen them so humanized. Nobody ever treats Ranpo’s quirks as a burden, or pities him for them. It’s even right in Ranpo’s backstory that he was constantly targetted and taken advantage of because he was only specifically really smart at one thing and couldn’t fit into society otherwise, and the detective agency was made to give him a place to fit in. 

Ranpo is valued for who he is. Because of that he’s able to be completely self confident and know his worth. His cocky attitude comes from the fact that he’s somewhere where he’s accepted by others. Not only that but Ranpo is also the person who helps accept other people into the detective agency, as shown in the empathy he showed Yosano. Rampo’s on my faves not because he’s treated like an eccentric super genius, but how much the story empathizes that underneath his layers he really is just a normal person the same as everybody else.

It’s one of my favorite quotes in the manga and it shows why I love humanizing work and human misery above all else. 

Your ability doesn’t matter. That sorrow has value. 

[shadows-in-the-light-of-day]

Top Five Anime Characters

so @irinyaclockworker tagged me in this approximately 748 years ago and I...never did it? so now I am doing it! I’ll go in reverse order...ish. Because really, can I really be expected to pick just five?

rules: list your five favorite anime characters and then tag five other people

5. Dr. Stein (Soul Eater)

I just started watching Soul Eater recently, and I can already tell this dumbass is going to be my favorite. You might say he’s a little screwy...hehehe. But anyway I just think he’s neat, and I’m excited to see more of him! Fun fact: someone told me he was a villain before I watched the show so I was REAL CONFUSED but pleasantly surprised when he turned out not to be. (Also I’m now seriously considering rolling around campus in a desk chair, just to see how people react.)

4. Bishamon (Noragami) 

Local woman attempts to adopt every lost spirit she sees, the result will warm your heart and then traumatize you irreparably! Anyway: Bishamon!!! Coolest and best girl!!! Listen, not only does she have really cool hair, not only is she really pretty, not only is she an absolute badass, but she really cares about her friends/family and tries (way too hard tbh, Bishamon please chill) to protect them! Your fave would never! An absolute legend tbh...okay, I’ll stop now. Thank you for listening. 

3. Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs) 

I’m not sure bandage rat boy counts as a favorite character so much as “character whose entire personality I’ve unfortunately absorbed into my soul” at this point but...he exists. He’s annoying as fuck, chaotic neutral at best, and needs some major therapy. We may never know what, if anything, he’s trying to hide with those bandages, and we probably don’t want to. It was between him and Kunikida for this one, since if I let myself have more than one BSD character on here the whole LIST would be BSD. But yeah...Dazai, poster child of bad life decisions and slacking off. 

2. Xerxes Break (Pandora Hearts) 

I obviously had to include Break, because although the Pandora Hearts anime...isn’t great...I love the characters and story, and Break’s character arc is really important to me for several reasons, especially in the manga. I mean, sometimes you just gotta come to terms with your past mistakes and try to move forward, which was something I...kinda really needed to hear when I watched and read Pandora Hearts. Plus, eating copious amounts of sweets in lieu of antidepressants is just a huge mood. 

1. Seishin Muroi (Shiki)

It took SO LONG to find a decent picture of him and it doesn’t even match the other pictures. >_< Curse you, Shiki, for being the world’s most underrated anime. Anyway, I had trouble picking a Shiki character because there are so many interesting ones, but I ended up picking Seishin...mostly because picking Ozaki would have meant too many crazy doctors/scientists in one post. This guy is a certified dumbass, world-record setting hypocrite, and REALLY needs to stop wandering around in the woods in the middle of the night. Like, yeah, you’ll probably get an idea for your next novel, but will you survive to write it? Who knows! (Also, if you haven’t watched Shiki, you really should. It may cause you to have existential and moral crises, and it will DEFINITELY leave you afraid of becoming dinner for the undead, but hey, isn’t that what a good show is supposed to do?) 

as for tags, I don’t desire to be bothersome nor to leave anyone out, so if you wanna do this, consider yourself tagged!